Silence
My silence has been deliberate. For as long as Tim was home, it has taken us to return to normal.
Today I found myself running and crying…neither of which, I can assure you, come easily to me but am proud I can do. I considered what it will be like to hug my husband the moment he is home PERMANENTLY. I can imagine it will feel more intense than the day I married him and the days we brought our children into this world. For our family will be intact…and more importantly, his safety will no longer be at the forefront of my thoughts.
I have tried remaining very positive during the deployment. However, there have been several moments over the past two weeks where I have struggled to muster up that kind of energy. In fact, there were, what I call my ‘morbid moments’, where I considered the thought of Tim not returning. I know it is common but before his visit I could live in a relatively ignorant, don’t-have-many-details world. However, as I hoped and expected, Tim shared a lot of his deployment experiences. Then, last week (as you know from his posts) there were several soldiers killed while driving on base. This news somewhat compounded the ‘morbid thoughts.’
One evening I asked God to reveal himself to me more. A response came a few days later when I was in the midst of a terrible day…one by one…random friends called or stopped by unannounced, a card was left in my mailbox, a meal and Easter Lilly were delivered, and Briggs’ sadness finally ceased. I figure it was just the kind of response I needed.
So…I am back!
…
Special thanks to…Tiffany Dunbar for the rock. Janice Brittsan for the phone call. Cathy Dwyer for being a rock. Alfega for your genuine kindness. Sue Mantel for jumping my dead van. Judy for bailing me out. My little buddy, Kristen Hohman, for her visits. Angela and Mary for a great lunch outing. Melissa for calling even with an infant at home. Stacy…always Stacy. Debbie for her friendship. Gwen Kuhns for her phone call. And all of the women for the AO Bible Study. Monica Richard for being of great help. Julie Bacher for a great and unexpected encounter. Jeni for her cute text messages. Nate and Helena for the unselfish giving of their time and the love they give to my children. Aunt Nine for her advice. Mom and Bill for having some special private time with each boy. And…to me for finally getting current on images. I spend so much time with wedding and portrait images for everyone else I have neglected to print any images of my own since Gage was a baby. I have 86 collage prints coming my way. I am so excited!!!
Some pics I never posted.
Hello Tiffany,
Kay Burleson - March 18th, 2008 at 7:22 amYou are so good at putting into words what all of us, who have loved ones in harm’s way, are thinking. In the Bible, it says “Pray without ceasing”. That is what my husband and I have been doing since our son left. We are keeping all of the men and women in your husbands’s Unit in our thoughts and prayers. Best wishes to you and your wonderful family. Kay and Bud Burleson
Thinking of you and your family so strongly. Can’t wait until Tim is home safe. I admire all of you for your courage and strength during this time. Sending positive thoughts.
Barb Gable - March 18th, 2008 at 10:04 amBy the way, Tim is looking pretty hot in those photos you posted!
:-)
Barb Gable - March 18th, 2008 at 10:06 amYour strength is admirable, your fears very human, your permanent reunion near. Even when these long and frightening days fade into memory the example you set for your children, your family and friends will always be remembered.
Natalie - March 18th, 2008 at 2:48 pmTiffany:
Once again, the Stoners have given us all an example of what it means to be a loving, caring, true American family. You guys are the best! We are counting the days until the Stoner 6 is together again and look forward to the laughter and tears of joy from having Tim and his entire unit home safe and sound.
All of our love,
Matt, Tracy and the Boys
Matt, Tracy and Boys - March 18th, 2008 at 9:04 pmP.S. Kevin Hohmann was too embarassed to say it, but asked me to send a message that Tim is, indeed, looking hot in those photos. However, he also told me to tell Tim that if he keeps eating those XXL bags of popcorn his ass will not fit into a normal movie theatre seat and he will need the “extender belt” for his saftey harness in the Blackhawk. Skinny people are mean like that.
With love,
Fatt Matt
Matt, Tracy and Boys - March 18th, 2008 at 9:10 pmTiffany,
I am so glad you are back blogging! I think of you and your family often. You all are always in my thoughts and prayers.
Allison Curry (Ann Smith’s friend from Chicago)
Allison Curry - March 19th, 2008 at 1:24 pmHang in there you are doing great, you are not far from PERMANENTLY.
Helena
Helena - March 19th, 2008 at 10:13 pmI love looking at you and the children in these pictures!
No worries about us, we WILL make it.
Not long now.
We will remain vigilant.
tim - March 21st, 2008 at 8:12 amtiffany, i agree, you have such a way of putting things into words and as proud of tim as you are i am sure he is just as proud of you holding your own fort down there with your little army. i will be so happy for you when tim is back for goo! in the meantime, as always, please let me know if you need anything! angela
Angela - March 26th, 2008 at 1:30 pm